Go See if the Ocean is Still There: A Lesson in "Just Be"

After a couple of rainy days, I'm back at little Hampton Lake Park. It's about nine o'clock in the morning, and I've just completed my walk. (For those of you who were with me for our photo tour of Hampton Lake ... no Turtle photos yet, but I'll keep trying.)

My walk time today was 15m 32s.
And now I will take at least 15m 32s to simply sit here by the water and ....
Just Be.

Big Sigh!

As I sit here at my favorite picnic table, I'm thinking that long ago ~ before September of 1997 ~ this “just being” time would never have happened. The Workaholic Me would never have allowed so much time to be wasted just sitting around. I may have done the walk, because it had a good purpose ... like losing weight ... or because I tend to problem-solve better while I'm in motion. But I would have made sure that I always finished under my 15 minute time limit. And eventually, I might have turned this into a competition with myself, to finish the mile faster and faster by mixing in some jogging with my walking. Eventually, I probably would have been jogging the whole mile, or maybe two.

Would that have been a bad thing?

Not really ... if I truly enjoyed jogging. But I don't. I have the greatest respect for people who do like jogging. And every once in awhile, I try it again. But I still don't like it. It's not my joy. So, the bad part of that self-competition thing would have been losing to my stop watch the joy of just being in this beautiful place.

Actually, as I think about it, Workaholic Me would not have allowed me to even sit here handwriting this piece, even though technically I'm still working. I would have felt like it was a waste of time. So I would have jot down a few keywords and quick thoughts, and then gone straight to my office to type this on my computer. After all, I type over 120 words a minute; therefore, I can type almost as fast as I can talk. That's being more efficient. That saves time. And how you spend your time is as important as how you spend your money. That's what the old me ~ the Director me ~ would have thought.

By the way, one of the little muskrats just swam by.
And ...
A little girl has just discovered that geese are taller than she is.
Thus, she is adamantly requesting her daddy to immediately, “Pick me up!!”

But to continue ...

Exactly when did I discover the joy of “Just Be”?

Ironically, it was at a point in my life when I had the least amount of free time than ever before. My “Computer Geek Husband” and I were living in Northern California near San Francisco. He was putting in those crazy "on-call 24-7" Silicon Valley hours. I was working as an Administrative Director at a large counseling agency, going to college full time, and flying back and forth to Upstate New York to help my sister and daughter deal with my aging parents' health problems. Plus, of course, there was the usual day-to-day household stuff.

I must have looked particularly harried ~ or a little crazed ~ on that way-too-busy midweek afternoon when my Executive Director boss turned to me and said, “Jae, why don't you go see if the ocean's still there.” I stared at him blankly, not at all able to take in the words, much less figure out their cryptic meaning. So, he pointed toward the front door, and said, “You need a break. Go out and look at the ocean. We'll come get you if we need you.”

And so, dazed and confused, I did as I was told.

Now, having lived in Upstate New York most of my life, I fully realize that not everyone is lucky enough to have an ocean view two blocks away from their office. But on that day, I was so happy that I did. And I was in awe that I was working in a place where people would even think of sending me out to look at the ocean because they thought I needed a break. So, as I just stood there on the bluffs overlooking the Pacific, the Workaholic Me had nothing to criticize me about, because I was just following my boss's orders.

When I finally just had to steel a quick look at my watch, I was amazed that five minutes had gone by already. And in that moment, I could feel that my tensed-up shoulders had started to drop. I remember taking a deep breath and slowly sighing it out. I remember that because this was such a pivotal moment in my life. As my tensed shoulders let down, I realized that all of my upper body muscles were aching and that I had a headache. And I began to wonder how many other times I had been so tensed up that I didn't even realize how much my body was hurting.

So I decided to stand there for a little while longer. It was okay; they would come get me if they needed me. And as I continued to “Just Be” with that ocean view and the damp, salt-water air, my headache started to fade, and I began to feel better with each passing moment. I became fully aware of the sounds of the churning waves and calls of the gulls. These beautiful sounds washed away that ongoing inner dialogue of “what I have to do yet ...” which we too-busy people of the world often have playing in our minds.

And then ... surprise! I realized that I needed to eat something! I had been so intent on the high-priority list of things that had to be done at work that day ~ and whether I was ready for the class I had to attend that night ~ that I had forgotten to eat. No wonder I felt lousy!

And . . . here's the aha moment . . . If I felt lousy inwardly, I was probably, unintentionally, projecting that lousy feeling to everyone around me. I cringed as I thought about how many years this had been my normal mode of operating.

Looking around to my right, it occurred to me that I could continue to follow orders, and just look at the ocean, from the coffee shop window on the corner. So, I decided to take care of that hunger ~ to take care of me. And to the delight of that Workaholic Me and the Director part of me, came the realization that by taking care of me, I was taking care of our staff, which would help everyone to be able to do better work. By being nice to myself, I would become nicer to work with and work around. And thus I would be helping to create a better environment for every person who came into our agency. Which, of course, included . . . me! It would be an infinite loop of of joy and more effective productivity! Way cool!

So now, today, as I am sitting back at my desk, typing in this posting, I invite you to check in with you.

How are you feeling right now?
Are your shoulders tight and scrunched up?
Are your muscles achy?

Do you have a headache from taking in too much information?
Or from keeping track of that inner “to do” list?

Do you need to take a break? Have a snack?
Or really just sit down and eat a good lunch or dinner?

What have you done to take care of you today?
(which also helps to create a nicer working and living environment)

What have you done ~ or will you do ~ to give yourself
a little time to Just Be?

If you don't have your own idea for this "Just Be" thing right now, here's a quick fix.

Just scroll down to the photo of our little Hampton Lake.
Double-click on it to enlarge the image.
And for just five minutes,
sit back . . . relax . . . look into the water . . . and . . .

JUST BE.

Peace & Light to You,
Jae

(As always, your comments are joyfully welcomed.)